I Am Your Age Plus Half Of My Age

My son asked me, “How old are you?”

And in reply, I said, “I am your age plus half of my age.”

My son is 22, how old am I?

Answer

44 years old.

Explanation:

x = father’s age

ABCDEx = 22 + ½x
x – ½x = 22
ABCD½x = 22
ABCDEx = 44

Q.E.D.

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Can You Swim?

Man 1: Bro, can you swim?
Man 2: Bro, ever heard about the Indian Ocean?
Man 1: Yes.
Man 2: I swam it all.
Man 1: Bro, have you ever heard about the Dead Sea?
Man 2: Yes.
Man 1: I killed it.

I Have A Boyfriend

Man 1: Bro, I went to the top of Himalaya and screamed “I LOVE YOU” so that I could hear the echo.
Man 2: Then Bro?
Man 1: Echo replied, “I HAVE A BOYFRIEND… A BOYFRIEND… BOYFRIEND…”

You Look So Pretty

Boy: I love you.
Girl: Shut up.
Boy: I’ll die for you.
Girl: Shut up.
Boy: I can’t live without you.
Girl: Shut up.
Boy: You look so pretty.
Girl: Really?
Boy: Shut up.